Archive for the ‘YouTube Crap’ Category

A few weeks ago I was surfing YouTube looking for some new videos to blog about, and I came across something that really shocked me. It seems our friend Retrogamer3 has created a new channel called “The Welfare Gamer”. Actually, let me rephrase that, it was actually called “The Gaming Rapist” but after the HUGE amount of backlash from his “fans” and other YouTube users, he deleted this account, and created the more PC aforementioned channel. Now Ed’s lack of taste has been pretty apparent before, but this is an all new low. I’m not quite sure why he would think something like that is funny in any way, but he’s proven time and time again that he really puts no thought into what he does.

He posted a video on his Retrogamer3 channel as his “Final Farewell” Just to tease us into thinking that he was going to stop making horrible, HORRIBLE videos. Alas, this was only a tease and thus “The Gaming Rapist/Welfare Gamer” was born. Now I’m really confused on who made “Ed” believe that he is a good actor, but the sooner he realize that he is horrible, the better off we shall all be. Unfortunately Ed is an arrogant SOB and obviously clueless, so I’m afraid that will never happen.

Now I would be very interested to know who (if anyone) found that mildly amusing, or funny in any way shape, or form. Ok you gambled away everything, and lost it all. Now you are homeless, living in a shed on welfare? Wow that’s really interesting. Your fake crying really tugged on our heart strings…. god this is horrible. I don’t know how he isn’t embarrassed watching these videos he posts. Why would anyone post something that horrible on the internet? Is this a comedy, or a drama? WTF is it supposed to be??

I also love how he talks about how he doesn’t know how he can continue making videos, when he is obviously shooting the video himself holding the camera…and found some way to post the damn thing to YouTube. I don’t know if he intends this video to be serious, or what. All I know is that it’s neither drama, nor comedy. It just sucks, plan and simple.

So what I gather from this first episode, he’s supposed to be a bum, wandering the streets (of middle class suburbia I might add) scrounging the trash to find retro video games? What the fuck??? The video starts off as him finding Double Dragon 2 for the NES, and go into a shed to “review” the game? He then talks about how he had to break into his “friends” house to upload the damn video to YouTube. Wow man, fucking genius. There isn’t really much I can say about this video. It’s so horrible, it really speaks for itself.

Once he finally gets around to talking about the damn game. (That is the point of a “review” right??) One of the first comments he makes is how he loved the game so much because it was “A Two player Double Dragon” Wow Ed, you prove once again that you know nothing about video games, or Double Dragon. If you had played the first game, you would have realized there was a few two player modes… you are a fucking moron.

Then what might be one of the most unfunny jokes he has ever done, he talks about how one of his female friends left him alone with her daughter, and says “You know what I did with her” and makes a dumb ass face. Once again tasteless humor. Besides Ed, we all know that you don’t have any female friends. You are too much of a fucking loser to have any females that would want to talk, or hang out with you. There are tons of clues on your videos to this fact, but none bigger than the fact that you created a channel called “The game rapist”

He spouts off many incorrect “facts” about Double Dragon 2, as well as the arcade version, but I don’t really have the energy to go through them all. If you care to laugh at them, watch the video for yourself.

The Retrogamer3 shit was bad enough, but this is an all new low Ed. I would actually welcome back the original horrible crap you used to shat out. At least we wouldn’t have to deal with this mess. It has to be one of the worst things I have seen on YouTube in a long, LONG time.

Advertisements

If you frequent YouTube and you play video games, you most likely have heard of the Machinima and Machinimarespawn channels. The majority of their videos are Call of Duty and Halo kill videos, and commentaries. These channels have hundreds of thousands of subscribers and to be totally honest, I have no idea why. Even taking into account the simple fact that these games are widely popular, I don’t understand how people can listen to more than 10 seconds of any of their videos.

(Notice how many times this guy calls people a “faggot”? If he is so good, why does he keep coming up with excuses on why he died?)

The first problem being that none of these videos actually teach you anything. The majority of the time they make dumb ass comments or do the usual “Live” douche speak/trash talk. Then you have the guys who’s lives are so boring that they resort to talking about their damn day. So again, what is the appeal? I’m watching your channel to listen to the same dumb ass stuff I can hear online? Why would I watch you play Death Matches online, when I could just go and play the damn game myself, and hear the same exact ignorant crap I am hearing in your video? Then, if you actually make a comment on the video about the poor quality….watch out because all of the fan boys will be out to lynch you. How can you defend that? They play a fucking video game and talk to you because they are lonely, and most likely have no lives outside of “pwning noobs” on xbox live/PSN.

The second problem is that none of these videos are produced particularly well. The sound quality is always poor, the editing is atrocious, and there is almost ALWAYS some lame guy that does not have a voice to properly commentate anything, let alone make a video like that interesting.

Then, you have the biggest problem. The guys whom are the self-proclaimed “masters” of whatever FPS they are commentating about. These guys sit there and ramble on and on during the entire length of the video on how good they are. They then proceed to show you that they really aren’t that great at the game while getting killed repeatedly. Then they try to make excuses about how their team sucks, or the other team is doing something to cheat them out of showing you their greatness. How can a person that is supposed to be a “master” of that particular game post a video where they are playing like crap, but talking about how good they are? They obviously must not realize how stupid that makes them look. Otherwise they probably wouldn’t post those videos….right?

What’s even worse is that these people take the games so seriously that they take all the enjoyment out of it. Instead of playing a game because it’s fun, it becomes an obsession for them.

If you make a living posting these videos then good for you. I just don’t get how people can watch the drivel that these “commentators” shat out. It seems like a new Call of Duty or Halo commentary channel starts every two mins. These people think that they are going to get rich quick, or make a name for themselves…but soon reality will hit them that no one really gives a crap about their small channel, and Machinima already has the market so flooded, that they will never make a dent in that market. I hate to break it to the people that have newer channels in this genre, you ARE NOT going to become millionaires.

(This video is especially horrible because the guy basically admits in the beginning that he has no idea that Hanoi is a city in Vietnam, and was too lazy to type Hanoi into Google)

If you are someone that is subscribed to any of these “commentary” channels, I have a few simple questions for you. Why? What is the appeal?

Best Costume EVER!!

Posted: October 29, 2010 in YouTube Crap
Tags: ,

Seriously, these people must be the coolest people on the planet. Not only does the costume look cool, but KRANG ACTUALLY MOVES AND TALKS!

So much better than the usual uninspired costumes you see every year.

Check it out and I’m sure you will feel the same way.

This sort of shit just reinforces my thinking that some people are from a different planet than I am. I don’t know how anyone thinks this is cool, funny, or even mildly amusing. This makes me want to gouge my eyes out with a plastic spoon.

Fuck this bitch, and the plastic pink My Little Pony figure she rode in on.
Good luck watching it, you will never be the same again. It rapes your eyes, and ears.

What…the FUCK…is THIS???

Posted: August 31, 2010 in YouTube Crap
Tags: , ,

Seriously, I want someone to tell me.

Recently, I found a post about this guys channel on Busy Street’s Blog http://thebusystreet.com/2010/08/24/this-is-unwatchable/

They posted some videos of the guy “hosting” some sort of Poker Game Show. It was horrid to say the least.

While browsing through this guys channel, I found these videos of a Monopoly Game show that he “hosts”. I guess he thinks that he has come up with some sort of awesome idea that will blow the pants off of the viewing public. I imagine this is one of those douchebags that submits these ideas to game show producers thinking that they are great. They probably take one look at it and laugh their asses off, just like I did.

When I first started watching this video, I couldn’t stop laughing at the horrible intro song.

As far as the “show” itself goes, I am not really sure what he was thinking. The “Host” sounds like he is on the damn phone calling in from Antarctica or something. I mean seriously, were you using a rotary dial phone recorded over a built-in mic on your laptop?

I find it equally amusing that the other person in the video is voicing all 3 contestants 2 of whom are supposed to be female.

The host himself can’t follow the game half the time, and makes several glaring mistakes during the video. What the hell? You can’t even follow your own damn game that you “invented”? You were so lazy that you couldn’t take the time to edit those mistakes out? You can’t be serious…can you?

I just don’t understand how people can post stuff like this on YouTube and not be embarrassed.

I know that this video is a few weeks old, but I just had to post it. This pretty much sums up my thoughts on any and every Vlogger on YouTube. Why these people are so popular, I will never know. Some of these people make 6 figures just spewing crap about their boring ass lives, and talking about their “zits” or what the fuck they ate for dinner. Then there are the people who steal content from others and make lame ass jokes about it. How do people find this funny, or entertaining? I mean other than just laughing about how fucking lame they are.

I have one question for anyone who subscribes and watches these people’s videos on a regular basis. Are your lives so boring that you need to resort to watching other people’s boring ass lives to make you feel better? If so; Why?

Feel free to enlighten me on this subject.